2025 Vanderbilt Football Mailbag #3: Answers to Your Questions – Anchor Of Gold

Letters… we get letters… we get stacks and stacks of letters…
I have 2 questions:
1 Why do SEC refs suck?
2 Do Pavia’s brothers have any eligibility left, assuming work releases or weekend passes? How about his mother? I mean whatever it is he got from his raising, I want more of it.
Tom Stephenson: My actual answer here is that refereeing is hard and because, frankly, refs could throw a flag on pretty much any play they want if they just want to flag all the ticky-tack stuff like, say, ineligible man downfield. It’s like how when the speed limit is 75 and everybody’s doing 85, you feel like the cops are picking on you when you’re the one car they decide to pull over and write a ticket to. Now there are some thoughts that this probably isn’t the appropriate place for about why certain people get pulled over for keeping with the flow of traffic and Vanderbilt gets flagged six times in a single game for having an ineligible man downfield, a feature of basically every offense that runs RPOs that referees have quietly decided to never throw a flag for because muh goofy 56-42 football games. As a reader of Anchor of Gold, you know exactly why this keeps happening.
The answer to the second question is no. Roel played for something called Briar Cliff in 2017 and Javier graduated from high school in 2018. I guess technically it’s not clear that Javier ever enrolled in college, but no, even stretching COVID eligibility rules I don’t think guys who graduated high school in 2017 and 2018 have eligibility remaining.
PatrickSawyer: To Tom’s point, they keep letting the rules erode. They did try to focus on Ineligible Man Downfield penalties a couple years ago with the rise of RPOs. Auburn in 2013 was notorious for getting away with it. I was at the game, so I could not see how egregious our downfield was. But they often do not call it if the offender is not play side. Like holding. Where guys get away with tackles then someone gets called for a slight jersey tug. The job is hard, and teams are always trying to play on the edge.
Andrew VU ‘04: They can literally call holding or some form of pass interference on every play. On us, I mean. Certainly not on their precious SEC blue bloods…
As for Javier, he absolutely should have eligibility if he was not a college athlete. Remember that 55 year old man who played for South Cackalacky State or some shit after a military career? I also think there was a kicker in his 60s (though that was not D1).
How much of the second half was the Virginia Tech defense quitting as opposed to Vanderbilt completing dominating in the run game and on the defensive front? Was there really a switch flipped by the Dores or did Virginia Tech begin to lose heart and help us by folding?
Tom Stephenson: I think Virginia Tech’s defense just got gassed. When your team’s offense runs a grand total of nine plays over a quarter and a half… well, the end result is a defense that’s too tired to do much of anything.
PatrickSawyer: I don’t think there was a switch flipped or anything that special. The only first half drive where Vanderbilt did not move the ball well was the fumble. First drive moved the ball 19 yards on 5 plays. Second was the quick strike TD to Brycen Coleman with 2 plays of 21 and 54 yards each. The third drive was Alexander’s fumble only second play after a 16-yard gain was negated by a penalty. Finally, the FG drive was 12 plays for 64 yards. Virginia Tech definitely got gassed in the second half, but they might have been steamrolled in the first half if not for turnovers.
Andrew VU ‘04: I don’t think any of it was Gor Vatech quitting, at least not by choice. If you get muscled around enough, your body gives out. It’s like that time Zapp Brannigan and I got sentenced to Death by Snu Snu.
S Carolina game is under the lights – How much will that 2H curb-stomping of the Hokies at night move the line?
Also – How much money would we have to pay Va Tech to get them on the schedule every year?
Tom Stephenson: I don’t know what you would have had the line for the South Carolina game at before the curb-stomping, but it’s South Carolina -5 right now. Which, fine, chicken curse and everything. For what it’s worth, that’s actually more generous than either Sagarin’s Predictor or Bill Connelly’s SP+ have it, both of which see it as more like a nine-point game, although Sagarin’s Recent rating has it right around five points.
As far as having Virginia Tech on the schedule every year, well, if some dipshits get their way they’ll just be an SEC team in a few years anyway.
PatrickSawyer: The line opened at 6.5 or 7.5, I believe. It has dropped to 4.5 or 5.5 depending on the book at last check. I think the dominant second half was probably worth 3 or 4 points.
I would not be a proponent of playing VT every year, but I would absolutely support them being in a rotation of like Georgia Tech, Wake Forest, and 2 or 3 other OOC schools for the P4 requirement. Keep playing home and homes. Doubt it takes any money to do that deal.
Andrew VU ‘04: I have no idea how much we would have to pay Gor Vatech, but let’s just say after the past two years, it would be the equivalent of a signing bonus to write Lincoln II. As for the Penises, the betting line is a lot closer than those who vote on the rankings would have us believe. It’s basically a toss-up, with home field advantage (usually a 3 pt swing to the home team automatically) removed. Beat the curse. Beat the Penises. Sure, they might like it, but it will be worth it.
Speaking of Gor Vatech, this might be my favorite Lisa joke:
How much would we have to crush SCar/Georgia State/Utah State by for a win over Bama at Bama to not be an immediate firing (possibly into the sun) for DeBoer?
Tom Stephenson: There is no amount of points we can beat those three by that will make Alabama fans not view a loss to Vanderbilt as a loss to Vanderbilt.
As a side note, I find it deeply funny that the Alabama football official Twitter account posted “Still BAMA” right above the score of the UL Monroe game. As though Alabama under Nick Saban would ever do anything more than stand on business about beating the shit out of UL Monroe. That is the strongest sign that they are not, in fact, “Still BAMA.”
PatrickSawyer: Even if Vanderbilt wins each of the next 3 games 220-0 to be ranked Top 10 (and I doubt Vandy cracks Top 5 in that scenario), losing to Vanderbilt in back-to-back years is an unforgivable sin in Bama land.
Andrew VU ‘04: The margin of victory over Utah State and Ugga State would not factor in, whatsoever. Heck, we could probably beat the South Cackalacky Game Penises by 50 and still get DeBoer DeFired. Such is the Ramajama Gumps fanbase.
Could we see two universities trade head coaches to avoid buyouts?
Tom Stephenson: In theory, I guess you could do this if you had two universities that (a) both wanted to fire their coach and (b) wanted the other’s coach and (c) both coaches wanted to go to the other school. In practice, imagine all three of these things being true at the same time. Florida might want to get rid of Billy Napier and Alabama might want to get rid of Kalen DeBoer, and Florida might be willing to accept Kalen DeBoer. Does Alabama want Napier? Does DeBoer want to coach at Florida?
Now, the scenario I could absolutely see happening some day is a smaller school agreeing to take on a fired head coach from a P4 (or bigger P4, if we’re talking about Wake Forest or something) in exchange for the smaller school’s current head coach. Like could I see Alabama wanting to hire, I don’t know, Kenny Dillingham and working a deal so Kalen DeBoer becomes the coach at Arizona State with weird contractual stuff going on? Yeah, I don’t see why not. Those specific names may not work, but I could see that sort of swap happening.
PatrickSawyer: No. There’s no way to make the equation work where both schools want to move on from a current coach and would take each other’s failure. Unless we are including firings for rules violations or improper conduct. That might work but is highly unlikely.
Andrew VU ‘04: Pretty sure Kevin Stallings retired.
Do you think that vandy should have been ranked after destroying Virginia tech especially after South Carolina had to rely on special teams to beat them at a neutral site game and are ranked #11? I feel like if a lot of other teams had the same resume they would have been ranked
Tom Stephenson: Yes, though I guess the poll voters must be thinking Virginia Tech isn’t that good.
Virginia Tech, after all, got blown out by Vandy at home so they must not be any good.
PatrickSawyer: Maybe? I am fine with not being ranked yet. My assessment is Vanderbilt probably is a Top 25 team, but there is enough uncertainty to not be frazzled yet.
Andrew VU ‘04: Fuck yes. They should be in the top 15. I mean, not the top 10, like 0-1 Notre Dame is, because I’d rather be undefeated, but top 15.
How much do we have to beat South Cackalacky by to be ranked next week? And if Pavia was a classic rocker, who would he be? Orbison?
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Add on question: how much do we have to beat them by to get in top 10.
Tom Stephenson: Honestly, given where South Carolina is ranked and that the game is in Columbia, we probably just have to beat them by any amount to get ranked. I don’t think getting ranked in the top 10 is possible. I mean, maybe if we won 80-0 or something.
PatrickSawyer: See Tom’s answer. Would probably need help with teams ahead of us losing even with an 80-0 win.
Andrew VU ‘04: 1 point. As for the second question, see my previous answer. We would have to be the Indiana wing of The Holy Roman Empire and be winless. I don’t find this acceptable.
If Pavia was a classic rocker, he’s Jerry Lee Lewis. He came out of nowhere, changed the landscape beyond measure, is full of enthusiasm, married a child bride who happened to be his cousin, known as “The Killer,” has a whole lot of shaking going on…
Could you recommend some other bubblegum pop, so Tom can expand his playlist?
Tom Stephenson: I had to spend another run listening to nothing but Ivan Mladek as a cleanse.
PatrickSawyer: Absolutely not. Gross.
Andrew VU ‘04: I mean, he’s always had a thing for that Romanian “Mr. Saxobeat” lady…
…so I have to assume he’ll like Lorde (ya ya ya):
Nah, that’s too nice. Let’s make him run to Mark and/or Donnie Wahlberg wearing a weird hat:
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